Absolutely nothing to do with Fleetwood Mac.

First off, I made my baby's first hat last night! I'm so excited about it and showing it off everywhere, it's a pear :] I made another hat as well, but haven't decided if it's done or not, so no pictures yet.

I had another dream about my baby (?!) last night. Same child as before, definitely a very cute little boy with darker hair. However, he was about 2-3 years old this time, and just at the tail end of potty-training. I got a little glimpse into his personality - very pleasantly, calmly intellectual. The kind of child people tend to call "precocious" if they appreciate intelligence, though I'm sure my grandmother (father's mother) would dislike him and consider him a pretentious smart-ass. More power to him. He was elaborating upon his previous thoughts on potty training, treating it almost scientifically. How adorable! Apparently, his name was Evan. When I realized that, I kind of "paused" my dream for a second - that isn't exactly the sort of name we were considering! Far too popular, for one thing, and not at all original. Oh, and I was pregnant with a baby girl. 3 years spacing between children is about what we're planning anyway, so that would work out nicely. This dreamchild is starting to seem so real, like I'm meeting him little by little through dreams. My mother always dreamed (accurately!) about her children, and she has also been quite convinced that we are having a boy. However, if I have a girl this time I'm going to be really confused!

If this kid keeps insisting that his name is Evan, I guess I can't begrudge him that. It seemed to fit. I'd just be sad to give up Zorion as a middle name (meaning: happy, origin: basque), and move Felix (meaning: happy and prosperous, origin: latin) to the #1 middle name spot from our first name list.

Family birthdates, and why I think I'll give birth within the week of my due date.

I have realized a most interesting phenomenon within my immediate family and grandparents. We were all (with two exceptions) born within the dates of the 20th-27th, in various months.

My immediate family:

January 27 - Paul

March 20 - Christina

April 22 - Dad

May 25 - Cassie

June 26 - Mom

July 24 - Me & Camille (Yes, we share a birthday! Oldest and youngest, born 20 years apart.)

September 11 - Tommy: the odd one out?

September 20 - Sam

Grandparents:

June 3 - Father's mother: another odd one out?

June 24 - Mother's mother (now deceased)

December 24 - Father's father

December 27 - Mother's father

William's birthday is October 22nd.

My due date is August 24th, which falls in the middle of the date variations... I have 4 days prior and 3 days after in which I must have my baby in order to fall into this pattern. Sounds good to me! Only time will tell if I'm psycho or psychic.

Stretch mark update: I now have 3... still inside my belly button. I hope this doesn't mean my stomach will turn into a spiderweb/sunburst radiating from my belly button. Either way, I'm going to have William apply designs in henna to my stomach (and hands, and feet, and...) the minute I get noticeable marks. I do use a very good cream that has been proven to prevent and reduces scars, but considering that I've already gotten stretch marks on my legs from not being pregnant, and my mother's stomach, it seems rather unlikely that I'll escape unscathed.

I am feeling pretty decent at the moment :] William is jumping at the chance for us to go out, but we'll see if I'm awake enough in an hour or two! I did have a bit of serious morning sickness, complete with vomit, a few days ago. Rather unpleasant, I thought that would be over with by now.

Oh, and I am fairly certain I have felt the baby move at times within the past few days!!! I really think it's a boy. Sometime within the past week I dreamt of a baby boy with a lot of soft dark baby hair. William and my mother are also very much convinced that there is a baby boy developing inside of me as well... and my mother has never been wrong about her own children. Let's see if that extends to grandchildren. I'm absolutely happy with either sex though, this feeling has nothing to do with any preferences.

+1

[picture!]

14 weeks 4 days

Cue: stretch marks & nosebleeds

I have ONE new one... and of course, it is inside my belly button. Where I haven't been applying skinergy cream. How superb. I've been reading all these horror stories about women who end up with a kind of.. not... belly button afterward, and I'm really scared that my formerly completely inoffensive belly button will become a lot less so. Permanently. 

My nose has also been bleeding all night, luckily it's so dry in here it just dries up inside instead of actually coming out of my nose (TMI...?). I suspect the only thing I can do about that is carry tissues with me at all times, because I am not about to bleed all over the very few clothes that fit me now. 

I feel like a lot of other people can still squeeze into their clothes at this point, but since I started out tiny (5'2, 112-5 lbs, size 0.. if I was lucky, and the clothing company didn't decide to pretend a 0 really meant a size 4+, which they all do nowadays to make more money because people will think they can buy smaller sizes)... proportionally, my stomach is A LOT bigger. As in, if the gap between my pants button is now, say, 4 inches, that is a much larger percentage of my "waist" measurement than that of most people. So, pants don't work, except for one pair that is low-rise (which I can wear if I undo the top button and wear a thick belt), and one or two that are stretchy enough that I can wear unzipped/buttoned - but only with a dress over top. Most of my shirts DEFINITELY don't work - the seams are popping :[ I do happen to have a few really loose, large, and/or empire waist dresses, but I realized yesterday that I am in serious danger of wearing the same thing every few days.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'd much rather get bigger now than suddenly get huge in the third trimester with the maze of stretch marks to prove it. I'm just letting my stomach stretch gently... kind of. My mother always told me I wouldn't start showing until at least 5 months, because she didn't and a lot of people who are having their first child don't - LIES! I consider it showing when a stranger asks me when I'm due - and that happened over a week ago.

Oh, and I did mean to post pictures.

10 weeks 4 days

13 weeks 1 day - As you can see, my stomach got MUCH bigger in 2.5 weeks.

Also 13 weeks 1 day: This is specifically for Kathleen, who thought I was pushing my stomach out in the last picture. NOT SO! I was just leaning back. Standing up straight actually makes my stomach look much bigger >.<

Baby- (and Jamie!-) friendly foods.

I have stumbled across a few packaged foods that not only taste incredible, but have amazingly whole/pure/healthy ingredients! They don't make me nauseous, either.

soft baked snickerdoodle cookies (brand: Enjoy life)

I think I just ate five of these. I couldn't help it! They're simply that delicious. They actually kind of taste bad for you, in the best possible way. I'm impressed! Oh, and I didn't notice any of the undesirable flavors put into this cookie (date paste, grape + apple + pear juice concentrates, rosemary extract?!) - and I have VERY sensitive taste buds.

Ingredients: Sorghum Flour; Date Paste; Grape, Apple and Pear Juice Concentrates; Brown Pure Cane Sugar; Expeller-Pressed Vegetable Oil (Safflower Oil and/or Sunflower Oil); Natural Rice Dextrin; Ground Flaxseed; Water; Xanthan Gum; Baking Soda; Vanilla; Salt; Cinnamon; Rosemary Extract

http://www.enjoylifefoods.com/our_foods/cookies/snickerdoodle.html

ICE CREAM. I really OD'd on ice cream as a kid, and subsequently lost my appetite for it. However, Purely Decadent Made with Coconut Milk Passionate Mango (brand: Turtle Mountain) is now an exception. The combination of passion fruit, mango, and coconut milk is to die for! Not to mention the texture... It is rich in a way I had never experienced.

Ingredients: ORGANIC COCONUT MILK, ORGANIC AGAVE SYRUP, CHICORY ROOT EXTRACT, MANGO PUREE, PASSIONFRUIT JUICE CONCENTRATE, CAROB BEAN GUM, GUAR GUM, NATURAL MANGO FLAVOR.

http://www.turtlemountain.com/products/purely_decadent_Coconut_Milk.html (Check out their other flavors as well)

For a quick 1/4 of a meal (depending on your appetite, it may be a whole meal), Organic Sunshine Burgers are the only non-meat burgers I could find at Whole Foods a) without soy and b) at a decent price. At only a little over a dollar per burger (about $3.70ish a package - 3 burgers), a box is kind to your wallet - and taste buds.

Ingredients: Ground raw sun-flower seeds, Brown rice, Carrots, Herbs, Sea Salt

http://www.sunshineburger.com/products/

They also come in Garden Herb, South West, and Barbecue flavors. I have not tried any of these yet, but do have the first two in my freezer.

The staple of my hydration is Mint Italian Sparkling Mineral Water (brand: Whole Foods). My mother asked me why the carbonation doesn't mess with my stomach. Truth? I have no idea. Other flavors of this particular brand do. Perhaps it's the mint? Very refreshing. I can't seem to find a picture of this one.

Ingredients: Carbonated Mineral Water, Natural Mint Flavor

10 weeks!!

I should really start taking some pictures of my "bump."

Nothing made of cloth should be that abysmally horrific.

Yesterday saw an attempt to go shopping with my mother for maternity clothes. It quickly became apparent that I would never be inclined to purchase such items in stores - nor do I expect to find any bras sans underwire I find even halfway presentable. This leaves me with a few options:

a) Try to make do with my clothing at hand. This IS potentially plausible, as I have many wrap skirts, wide yoga pants that tie at the side etc that ought to fit throughout my entire pregnancy. I would still need a few tank tops and perhaps some sweaters - the former being a basic item and less likely to disturb my vision, the latter having nothing to do with maternity clothes in the slightest.

b) Try online - Etsy, ebay, e...whatever. I'm scared to death of ordering things online though, as the foray into maternity stores and sections taught me that I am apparently far too tiny to begin with, and their "small" items will always be too large on someone who was a size zero pre-preg.

c) Just buy larger sizes in stomach- and breast-friendly cuts. That is apparently what other very small people have done. I could have seen this working, if it weren't for the fact that I despise the lack of creativity in the upcoming season. I don't even like the "normal" clothes out right now. Still, there may be items coming out for the summer than I will like. Wait and see?

d) Dust off my sewing machine, procure a serger, and make my own clothing. I like this idea best. I have absolute control over fabrics, color, style, fit... perfect for someone as particular as I am. There is a machine going for $5o on craigslist (barely used), but they have no picture. Hopefully it has not been snatched up already, so I can make an appointment to see it.

Oh, and perhaps you noticed that I listed no options regarding bras? There's a reason for that: options are rather sparse. I bought the best-looking one I could find at Macy's on Inauguration Day, and I still think it looks grandmotherly (no offense to grandmothers...) and boring. I'll have to go back to return it, as soon as I feel up to walking the 10ish blocks there & immediately back.

Sadly, none of this would really be an issue if it weren't for the fact that it is far too cold to be looking like half a hippie at work.

Sizewise: from a grape to a lime.

Supposedly, that is how much our baby is growing this week.  Not to mention major organs are still forming. No wonder I can't keep my eyes open for longer than a few hours! I'm also remarkably dehydrated, despite the continual chugging of water. I hope this lets up by tomorrow, as I need to go to the DC DMV to get a photo ID, and then to VA to go shopping for maternity clothes (or transition clothes, or both) with my mom. I meant to go to Chinablock today to go to H&M for something warm and cheap, but the exhaustion prevailed. 

"It's like a tapeworm, but a lot better."

....Indeed. So William is comparing our baby to a TAPEWORM. Amusing. I suppose I've called it a leech once or twice.

I haven't written in this much (once...), but now seems to be the time to pick it back up again - we are having a baby! According to my mother's OB/GYN (Dr. Gonzalez) and the ultrasound, today I am 8 weeks 5 days. It was amazing hearing and seeing the heartbeat & baby. I didn't want to start writing until a) we were certain there was a very low chance of miscarriage and then b) it was time to tell everyone. That time is now!

Responses to the news have mostly all been very positive, with the exception of a few neutral and one remarkably negative response - however, it may have been misconstrued, and hopefully was NOT in relation to my pregnancy (despite the potential evidence to the contrary). It will be the first grandchild on both sides, so the parents are all very excited. My baby sister Camille will be barely two years old when the baby is born - due August 23 - so she will have family in the area to play/be spoiled with. She does have two cousins around her age (Ginny's new adopted baby Esther, and Jessie's baby Ellie), but they are in Ohio and Oregon, respectively.

I had pretty bad nausea for weeks, but that started subsiding after I learned I was pregnant and started to eat to feed it. Not only can I eat grains now, I have to in order to not feel sick!! Amazing. I have been eating very well, as always, so I'm sure that helps keep the stomach problems at bay. I'm actually starting to eat meat a little again though, it seems oddly necessary sometimes.

A fitness plan is in the works, so as to feel better later and bounce back from this pregnancy quickly. The yoga studio on P St next to Whole Foods has a prenatal yoga class on Sunday afternoons - how convenient! That is one time I am almost guaranteed not to have to miss. I am also hoping to find a prenatal yoga video to use at home, in the interim.

notes to self. 9.16.08

soft
layers
leotards
tie legs
cream
plaids
knit
loose over-knees
mini-puff sleeves
scoop necks
middle-buttoned
full-loose
cotton and silk jerseys
forest green